i am alive

Hello guys. Long time no post (just over a week i think) i have been sososososox100000 busy!! Ive done so much overtime at work, then had college and on top of that I have also been ill. But all is good and i have a day off tomorrow horray! I have been looking at tumblr sites a lot recently, found some really good ones there are some amazing quotes! So i have added a few to the links that you should check out.

'Awkward moments define me. I’d sleep all day if I could. I lack the capability to keep my mouth shut. Yeah, everyone has bad days, but I seem to have more than my fair share. If you don’t like me, don’t act like you do. I swear, it offends me less. I’ve made mistakes and I’ve let people take advantage of me and I’ve accepted way less than I deserve. But, I’ve learned from my bad choices and even though there are some things I can never get back, and people who will never be sorry, I’ll know better next time and I won’t settle for anything less than I deserve.'
photo+quote from here

'Gratitude. Appreciation. Giving thanks. No matter which words you use, it all means the same thing: happiness. We’re supposed to be happy and grateful- for friends, for family. Happy just to be alive.' Grey's Anatomy found here


'I believe that two people are connected at the heart and it doesn’t matter what you do or who you are or where you live. There are no boundaries or barriers if two people are destined to be together.'
Julia Roberts quote/the photo above found here


'We deny that we’re tired. We deny that we’re scared. We deny how badly we want to succeed and most importantly, we deny that we’re in denial. We only see what we want to see and believe what we want to believe. And it works. We lie to ourselves so much that after a while, the lies start to seem like the truth. We deny so much that we can’t recognize the truth right in front of our faces.'
photo/quote found here

100 Ways To Be A Love Letter To The Universe
from here
photo from here
Do your lips up sticky, sparkly & sweet. Then blow kisses. Say thank you. Allow other people to inspire you. Share your bliss. Smile — even if you’re shy, even if you have bad teeth, even if it scares you. Hold someone’s hand. Be honest. Volunteer your time. Love yourself. Do your best. Learn how to balance having respect for other people’s decisions & being true to yourself. Tell people how much you like them. Send unexpected gifts. Talk to strangers. Do favours. Let go. Be generous. Eat whatever you want without guilt. Don’t think about other people’s definitions of success, beauty or happiness. Make your own rules. Write your own guidebook. Count your blessings. Never stop trying to improve. Be your own superhero. Aim higher. Contribute. Create spaces for other people to enjoy. Sleep in. Let other people sleep in, too. Be compassionate. Listen. Give yourself time off. Be enthusiastic. Choose happiness. Create. Follow your passion. Connect. Compliment people. Spend time with people who make you feel good about yourself. Surprise yourself. Appreciate the people who support you. Take photos; document everything. Have a plan. Know your patterns. Be in the present. Laugh. Get close. Move through your fear. Challenge yourself. Keep it simple. Turn up the music. Realise your own freedom. Relax. Flirt. Dress up in some small way every day. Even if it’s just a good pair of knickers or a coat of death-defying mascara. Be different. Be genuine. Allow yourself to change & evolve. Dream big. Believe that you can manifest anything. Take responsibility. Treat everyone the same way — from your lover to your mother to your postman. Appreciate your past for having made you the person you are. Talk about how you feel. Dance. Sing. Let go of guilt. Treat your lovers with respect. Admit your flaws. …& come up with a plan to remedy them. Surprise people. Set yourself a really huge goal. Then achieve it & set another one. Kiss. A lot. Remember that trouble doesn’t last. Be still. Look at the stars. Be as ridiculous as you like. Trust that you are loved. Stay curious. Charm people. Give real hugs. Bat your eyelashes. Forget yourself. Reach out. Flatter people. Get drunk on life. Release your expectations of other people. Allow them to be who they are, & appreciate them regardless. Stretch. Listen to your instincts. Make eye contact. Keep your word. Talk about real things. Discover yourself. Speak up. Let life excite you & lead you astray. Delight in every day. Don’t be afraid. Just love.

have a break

I haven't had any time for the internet over the last few days, I would say my week has been busy but I think that would be an understatement. Chaotic is more like it! But I have decided that I should have a well earned break!
How are you all? :)
I did get chance to pop online during college and read comments from the last post, and they were so comforting. Just knowing that other people can relate to how you are feeling can make things easier because you know that it's not just you that it is happening to.
I do feel slightly better about it but I won't ramble on and bore you all with the details.

Today I bought some of these from Topshop. I have wanted some for a while and I can't wait to wear them with oversized tee's!

**

While I am writing this I am watching A Little Princess, which is such a beautiful film that I have not seen in the longest time.

Photos are from here

**

"One day, you fall for this boy and he touches you with his fingers and he burns holes in your skin with his mouth and it hurts to look at him and it hurts when you don’t and it feels like someone’s cut you open with a piece of glass."

"I can’t quite pinpoint what it is about him but I don’t think of anyone else. No one the same way, not in the least."

I want this sort of thing, so so badly.

Photos from the first and second of the Diary of a Crush book series by Sarra Manning.
Quotes from here.

attraction

Have you ever met someone who you hardly know, had a few conversations with them and are totally attracted to them? It has happened to me a few times and is happening to me at the moment, with someone who I work with who I have just met last weekend, who is also 3 years older than me and probably sees me as a child (which I am not.) but age differences seem to matter a lot more to the under 20's, wheras when people get older there is no problem with one person being years younger or older. The problem is, people see me as really innocent and cute which I really do not like, as it makes me seem younger than I actually am which at this age of my life is quite frustrating. I get asked for ID at the cinema trying to see an aged 15 film which is infuriating. I am enjoying my youth, I am not someone who is trying to grow up too quickly but I just hate these situations that I frequently find myself in.

I want the sort of relationship that you only read about in books and see in films. Where he makes me feel like the most special, beautiful girl in the world - even though I would know that I was not, it would still be amazing to be made to feel that way. Someone who would fight to be with me, not like a violent fight with someone else, something like if I tried to walk away or if I was mad he would fight for me to come back. Does this even exist, or is it something that so many people want that there have been countless books and films based around this sort of love? Is our generation as romantic as years gone by, or have the previous generations set a standard that nobody lives up to anymore, which leaves some of us in disappointment?

I have also added some new blogs to the list on the left and a new category, 'the cute/inspiring reads', which you should check out if you have time time. Two of my favourites at the moment are Am I Flirting? and Crushes, which I discovered on Rags and Scribbles blog. The Crushes are so adorable and sweet to read, and Am I Flirting? is also a great read and is also quite funny, and at the moment they have just done a post with lots of amazing songs.

I am sorry this is such a short, stupid post but this is something that is really irritating me today whether it is pathetic or not.
I hope everybody has had an enjoyable weekend :)

all the girls

This goes out to all the girls
(and partly to all the guys who should know better)

Here’s to all those girls who used to be his number one.

The ones who waited all night for him to call, only to check your cellphone the next morning and be disappointed. The ones who made it through that bitter break up, dried your own tears, and moved on with your life, only to have him walk back in it months later like nothing ever happened. Those of you who cried on the first day you talked again because you knew exactly where this phone call was going. The ones who listened to him say, “I only want to be your friend”, one day, then listened to him say that he loves and misses you, and the next when he doesn’t want to be anything at all. Here’s to the ones that took him back, hoping that maybe this time, he was different, hoping that maybe people really do change.

We listened to our friends tell us that we were stupid for even thinking about giving him another chance, got crap from our parents, and even snuck around to see him even for a while. We went through the great stage with no fights all over again. We started this out thinking it would be just friends, and ended up falling in love with him again. We wanted nothing more in the world than to hear him tell us he loved us too, that even though things were bad in the past, they would be different this time. And when we finally heard it, it was like we were dreaming. This is for us.

Here’s to the ones who believed what he said, sat around all over again waiting for a phone call that might come in a few hours, or a few days. Here’s for the tears cried and dried all over again. We wanted so desperately to believe that he was really busy, he couldn’t possibly call us at that moment, or even that he fell asleep early. We trained ourselves to believe the lies because we wanted to believe we had found the one for us. We learned to SETTLE for someone who didn’t treat us the way we should be treated.

Here’s for the ones who did their hair and make up and put on their prettiest everything, only to hear him say that he couldn’t see us today. The ones who never believed it when people told us there might be someone else. We just couldn’t believe that he could do this to us again.

This is for those great girls, who loved him more than words can say, and took him back no matter what happened last time because they couldn’t bear to look back on their lives one day and wonder “what if”.

This is for the girls that stayed up all night long listening to him whine about an ex girlfriend who cheated on him, and cried during the entire conversation. The ones who hoped he would realize that he deserved better, that he deserved us.

When he said that he loved you, but he was in love with her, he didn’t mean it.
This is for the ones that held on to something that was never there to begin with.

This is for us girls, who somehow managed to get him to forget about her, and get him to tell us that he was in love with us again, only to have him tell us three weeks later that “You’re just not the one for me.” or maybe, “things were going too fast, I’m just not ready.” (Then later on find out he has a damn girlfriend already)

Here’s to the girls who couldn’t cry to their friends because of how stupid they felt. The ones who held it all in when things came crumbling to pieces again. This is for the ones who couldn’t bear to even tell their mom what was going on, for fear of an “I told you so.” The ones that could just TELL that they had made a mistake ever allowing him into their hearts, their beds, and their dreams again.

We knew that we deserved better the entire time, that we deserved a guy who would call when he said he was going to, one that would come see us whenever he got the chance, one that would really care about us. We just wanted the one that we loved like that.

Here’s for the ones that FINALLY realized that he never gave one thought about them.

Here’s for the time that he took to waste, breaking your heart … again. This is for those days spent trying to hold back the tears, and the tears that turned into anger, then disappointment. Here’s for us girls who finally realized that we deserve better.

This is for those confusing days, when you miss him, and want nothing more than to hear his voice, or feel his arms around your waist.

Stay strong, and remember that relationships are like broken glass, sometimes it’s better to leave it alone rather than try to put the pieces back together and get hurt all over again.

Remember the times you cried, and how long it took you to even be able to look at another guy like that. When your song comes on the radio, turn the station.

When the day comes that he realizes what a mistake he made and tries calling, turn your phone off. When he tries coming to your house, don’t answer the door.

Think of all the broken promises, and the lies, the manipulation and the tears, the wasted moments and staying up all night wondering where the HELL he was.Think of how your heart used to jump when your phone would vibrate in the middle of the night, and how it fell to your stomach when you saw it wasn’t him, and realized that once again, he hadn’t called when he said he was going to.

One day, you’ll find a guy who’s worth all the tears, but he won’t make you cry. You may think that you’ll never care about someone like you did that guy that you always ran back to, but you will.

It’s gonna hurt like hell, and it’s going to need time to heal, but the point is, it will heal

**

I found this at
This is my heart. It is a good heart.

I am not currently in a situation like this. I have been, know people who have been and people that are. I am just waiting for someone to come along, hoping that someone will. But I do know that being in a situation like that can be one of the hardest feelings to deal with and hardest feelings to get over. Those words are so beautiful and so true, so I had to share them even if some people do not agree.

live laugh love

I want to spend all of my days laughing and smiling, speaking to the people that matter, watching the clouds float dreamily above me and finding pictures in them, singing and dancing in the rain, appreciating the sunshine by spending all day outdoors, discovering new films, music and books, cuddling up at night with a hot chocolate spending quality time with my family, painting my nails bright colours, dressing up just because I feel like it, helping people that need it, showing my friends and family how much they mean to me, loving with all of my heart, discovering new places, meeting new people and living each day like it could be my last.

one
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four
five
six

andreas gursky

I love Andreas Gursky's photography. These are a couple of my favourites, I love how they are all so busy and bright, they are so captivating. My favourite is the last one, it is such a beautiful, interesting photo, I can look at it for ages just looking at the different people through the different windows.

Today I was more realistic about my bag choices from yesteday. I stayed away from the Marc Jacob beauties in Selfridges and wandered off to Topshop instead. Their pretty collection will have to satisfy me for now, when I can finally make a decision on which one I want!

dreaming bags

Ahh today was so, so, so, so cold! I was even freezing in my new winter coat, so tomorrow I shall go that extra mile and dig out my favourite Accessorize mittens and Topshop scarf. I think I will also need an umbrella because English weather is not very happy at the moment.
To add to the coat, scarf and mittens that I have all ready for the winter, I have decided to treat myself to a new bag because all of my old ones are either falling apart or the colour has faded. Now, I am not about to stop using them as I like to use my clothing/accessories until it is physically impossible. But a new bag would be nice. I have decided I want a black one because it goes with everything and I only have one black bag which I am getting a little bored with.
These are a few of my 'I wish I could buy these' bags. If I saved up I could do, but they are very very expensive for a college student!

1. Stella McCartney 2. Marc by Marc Jacobs 3. Mulberry
I can dream, can't I? One day, I will own a gorgeous bag like these.

I do have to say I am so, so annoyed that Laura has been voted off X Factor! She was one of my favourites, along with Diana, and I do not think she should have been voted off yet, especially when there are people who are doing a lot worse than she is. I just hope that she does make it regardless, she is certainly talented enough!

away with the fairies

I love being in a daydreaming mood, the kind where you cannot help but disappear inside your own thoughts. This happens very often, maybe it is something to do with me being a Pisces, if you believe in horoscopes, they are supposebly very daydreamy. It is so peaceful and relaxing and there is something special about being left to your thoughts. I love the situations and places you can imagine, something that would be impossible is suddenly the easiest thing to manage and it can be really helpful when I am sad or angry. The only thing about it that I find strange is being around other people when I am in this sort of mood. It makes me feel so detached and uninterested in what is going on. Also, I probably give off the impression that I am moody or unfriendly when really that is not the case. This happened to me today, but then again it could have been because of the fact I had to spend a bus journey with a very boring person and I would much rather dream about being in my own special fairytale.
At the moment this is what I'm dreaming of..

A trip to the beautiful Italy...

My very own magical castle...

And heart warming love...

One, Two, Three, Four, Five, and Six.

Influence

"Sometimes you feel everything and nothing all at once. Sometimes you’ll find yourself smiling while missing someone at the same time. At times you can absolutely love a person, all the while wanting to hate them so badly. Life comes without guarantee’s, except that smiling will brighten your face, laughing will enhance your eyes, and falling in love will change your life."

From This is my heart. It is a good heart.

The Olsen's have definetely created a storm around the world, and it isn't hard to understand why. They are both beautiful women who are known worldwide as fashion icons, designers, actresses, authors.. is there anything these two can't do?
I am so so excited to read Influence. It isn't out in the UK for another few weeks, so any American's count yourselves lucky that it is already out there! I shall be rushing to buy a copy on the day that it comes out, but the only problem I have is which cover do I choose?!

Anyone have a favourite Olsen? Some people can't tell the difference, others love them both but I tend to alternate between them.. At the moment my favourite is Ashley, I love her style so much. Her outfit at the book signing above is gorgeous. I would very happily change places with either one of them given the chance!
Anyone who has already read the book what do you think?
Photos are from Mary-Kate and Ashley Fan

busy little bee

Ah I have been so so so busy the past few days, so I've only just had time to blog. Finally finished all of my work though, which is a relief! My poor cat is absolutely terrfied of all of the fireworks. I like to watch them but the noises always make me jump. Is anyone going to be having fireworks for Bonfire Night tomorrow?
I am so tired that I can barely think of anything interesting to say.

These photos are by Brassai, I love the darkness of them, they look so mysterious and interesting.

oh happy shopping days

I can not believe it is November already. This year has flew by...

I woke up this morning to find I had a parcel in the post! Excitedly, I opened it up to discover a gorgeous necklace and a beauitful pendant that I had ordered from the ragsandscribbles store on Etsy. You should check it out, it's full of lovely handmade things that you won't be able to resist!


Aren't they lovely? :) I wore the necklace today and I can't wait to find a chain for the ballerina so she can dance from around my neck.
I then went shopping with my mum for college supplies (yawn) but we ended up in an amazing second hand store where I found the most perfect t-shirt dress and a lovely headband sort of thing.
So all in all today has been a good day so far - and it's not over yet!
I hope everyone had a wonderful halloween full of lovely lovely treats!